• Current Time: 4:03 a.m.
• Number of 20 page papers I have due in one week: 2
• Number of pages I’ve written so far: 4
• Amount of time I’ve spent working on these assignments tonight: Zero
• Amount of time I’ve spent dicking around on Wikipedia and Youtube tonight: Quite a bit
• Amount of money the teaching fellowship I’ve applied for is worth: Let’s just say a couple thousand dollars
• Impact my grades this semester will have on my candidacy for this fellowship: A lot
• Level of stress and anxiety at the moment: Unreasonably low
• Sense of Priority: Pretty screwed up, it would seem
• Denial: Not just a river in Egypt, apparently


I have no idea what’s been going through my mind lately, but it hasn’t been close to impossible to get me motivated about these assignments and I haven’t a clue as to why. For the most part there subjecst I’m fairly interested in, also as I’ve stated above these grades are pretty important.

This makes me think back to last year at this time when I was completely fretting and worrying about my academic performance and getting into grad school. My self-esteem was entirely too wrapped up in my grades, to be honest and most of my friends would probably confirm this fact. now part of me is proud to say that that’s not the case, but at the moment I think I could use a little bit of anxiety, as apparently it’s the only thing that gets meworking.

If dear reader, you would like to help out your beloved author I would encourage you to pick a random time day or night over the next two weeks(I didn’t even mention the third paper I have after these two are over) and call me, e-mail me or otherwise get my attention. Once I’ve responded please calmly but firmly asked me some of the following questions:

- If I’m currently working on one of these papers
- Why the hell not
-If I realize how much money is at stake
- How much I actually accomplished since I last spoke to you
- If I realize how much easier this’ll be if I just get it over with
- What’s my deal anyway?
-Ketchup or Catsup??

I’m going to disconnect my computer from the Internet for third time tonight and hide my modem in an even better location this time.